our boy

In my return to the blogosphere, I dropped a small teaser.  ...baby No. 2.

He is here.  Our boy, Gabriel Paton, arrived in October, which means that we are coming up on one year with him in our lives.  It's cliche, but I'll say it.  It's like he's always been a part of us.

The past year with him has been pure joy.  Pure [tough, exhausting, and sleepless] joy.  We were instantly taken with this little guy.  He is sweet and gentle, and he has the greatest boyish grin.  I could go on.

Piper is the most loving and attentive big sister.  She and Gabe are always into something, and the sound of them making each other laugh is completely beautiful.

As for Mom and Dad, bringing home the second was something we couldn't have been prepared for.  At times, we have been ungraceful and have cried out to the heavens in desperation.  Mostly for lack of sleep, and often for lack of patience.

The past year has taught us about God's goodness and His grace.  We have learned that it is not about us.  Our resolve to pray for our children, for their salvation, and that they would live lives that are worthy of His calling has been strengthened.
 
And mostly, we love this family that the Lord has given us.

Gabriel Paton Gilliam official stats:  Born Saturday October 26, 2013 at 1:15 pm  8 lbs 14 oz and 21 inches of pure handsomeness.  

a time for parting

In my last post I alluded to some big changes that are happening in our lives, and last night we took a necessary step to "close one chapter", making way for the new and unknown.  It happened with a tearful prayer, "Lord, thank you for friends."

And with that, we shared with the members of our small group the news that our family is leaving the church that we have called home for the past 10ish years; since before Zach and I were married. 

We are currently at the intersection of joyful anticipation, and sorrowful parting.  To call the people in our small group friends, doesn't quite do it.  Family is closer.  "Bosom friends" whom we  have labored along side; who knew us before babies made us wiser, and tireder, and brought us home earlier at night.

Our prayer is that we would maintain those friendships, although we know things won't quite be the same.  And our pleading is that the Lord would keep us all, as we continue on in this race.

Church planting has always been dear to us.  As teenagers, we dreamed that our church planting would look like grass huts in far away places.  As newlyweds, the Lord showed us what it means to be "on mission" wherever He would plant us-- even if that was in our home town.  And now, we are excited to join dear friends who love a city just down the road from us. 

Stay tuned.  There is more to come as life continues to surprise us.

two years later

Well, it has not quite been two years since we all giggled at that little girl in her first costume:  the most adorable elephant.  And in those two years, everything has stayed the same and everything has changed.

I guess you could say that I have something of an excuse for keeping my thoughts to myself.  In these two years we have continued to watch our girl grow, and grow she has; we have moved, we've changed jobs, we are looking forward to moving and changing jobs again, and...drumroll...we welcomed baby No. 2. 

Life and busyness have taken their toll, stretched us to our ends, grown us in our love, and taught us more about the goodness and faithfulness of our God.

And while I am often satisfied to stay busy and chalk up this empty page to another mess that needs cleaning or another little one that needs cuddling, there is more to my silence.

The truth is, it is much easier to believe that someone else is more qualified to put words to these thoughts and struggles and triumphs.  To put it more simply, those other mamas are more glamorous; they have it together; they never yell at their littles; and they certainly don't go to bed without cleaning their kitchens.  What do I have to offer?

It is truly amazing the access that we have to information.  Imagine if our Christian predecessors could offer hope to one another via text messages or a blog post.  Would they, too, play the comparison game? 

So while I've been silent, I've still been reading.  Soaking up the wisdom and encouragement that others so willingly open themselves up to share.  And all the while, the evil one has been planting seeds of doubt.  Because that's what he does.

This isn't a pledge to post more and share cute pictures of my kiddos.  It is a plea for prayer and grace, something we all need, because I have yet to meet another human who has not, at one time or another, compared themselves against an impossible standard.  Praise be to the One who offered Himself up so that all He asks of us, He provides.